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So, this one time, I’m thinkin’—erotic-massage, animated? Hands moving, slow frames, sexy as hell. Exaggerate the oil, shiny, over-the-top, boom! Scarlett Johansson’s voice in my head, “You’re not hopeless.” Ha, sarcastic me—hopeless? I’d kill at this. Knots in back, gone, poof, magic fingers. Surprised me once—therapist hummed, creepy but hot.

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The local park, Lovelace Gardens (yes, that name’s spot-on), is where folks come for a breath, a cuddle, maybe a scandalous rendezvous under the trees. I remember when I first strolled there, damn, my heart raced like I was about to drop a truth bomb in a public lecture – I was like "Shoot, I'm alive!" The trees, the benches, even the awkward pigeons made me think about the juxtaposition between raw sexuality and pure nature. Total Eric Andre mayhem in a garden!

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