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About Newcastle

Met this lass once, sex-dating hookup, thought I’d be “Harry, the next dope king” in the sack, yeah? Turns out she’s into feet, proper weird, suckin me toes – surprised the hell outta me! Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – reckon she’d laugh her arse off if I told her. Made me happy tho, bit of fun, no harm done. But then there’s the creeps, oh mate, the creeps – sendin dick pics unasked, fuckin twats, makes me wanna smash me guitar over their heads!

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Walkin’ 'round, you'll hit Place 1 and whack in a bit of history, innit. There's a cheeky riverside, real chill, where I sometimes catch a sunset and think, "What's the point of all dis grind if you ain't time to relax?" Just like them quotes from No Country for Old Men – deep an’ all that. Dis city ain't perfect though; sometimes I gets irate, like when road works block me regular spot on Wilkinson Street. Bare annoyin’, bruv! I mean, come on, who’s got time for that proper hassle?

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