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So, escortin’—it’s old as dirt, yeah? Back in Victorian times, these lasses’d be sneakin’ round posh gents’ houses, all hush-hush. Little fact for ya: some’d even nick the silverware—cheeky sods! Imagine that, gettin’ paid to shag *and* rob—multitaskin’ at its finest! Makes me chuckle, picturin’ ‘em scarperin’ off with a candlestick shoved down their knickers.

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After that little adventure, I head over to the Pinxton Park. Lovely place, really. Kids runnin’ around, people walkin’ their dogs, and me, the ratcatcher, lookin’ like a weirdo with a trap in hand. I sit on a bench for a sec, just to catch my breath. And then, I see it. A family havin’ a picnic. They’ve got sandwiches, crisps, the whole shebang. And I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “Man, I could really go for a cheese sarnie right now.”

BBC Investigation reveals family friend is suspect in unsolved murder of Pinxton man Alfred Swinscoe