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Now, listen up, ‘cause Madea gon’ break it down! I heard ‘bout this one spot—shady lil’ joint down in Atlanta, swear fo’ God! Folks whisperin’ ‘bout it like it’s some underground gospel. They sayin’ it ain’t just hands workin’ them muscles, naw! They usin’ oils from some ancient recipe—prolly Cleopatra’s bathwater or somethin’ wild! Little known fact, chile: back in the day, them old-timey kings got massages that’d make yo’ grandma blush! Hist’ry books don’t tell ya that, but Madea knows, halleluyer!

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Then, I bump into an old friend from uni. We start chatting, and I’m feeling all nostalgic. Oundle’s got that vibe, you know? The old buildings, the river, it’s like a postcard. But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring! I mean, seriously? One minute, sunshine; the next, I’m drenched.

Oundle School 'incredibly proud' as it reveals star of popular BBC show The Traitors Alexander was former pupil