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Lemme tell ya, doc, it’s ancient – like, Egypt-old! They say Cleopatra got these oily rubdowns from her servants, probly with some sexy incense goin’. Ain’t that nuts? History’s full of freaky lil secrets like that. Makes me wanna hop around gigglin’! But yo, it’s tricky – some folks think it’s all sleazy, and I get it, bugs me too when it’s shady. Like, “The occupiers impose their rules” – that’s from *Timbuktu*, doc, and it fits! Pushy jerks ruinin’ a good thing.

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So, I get home, and what do I find? My flatmate has eaten the last slice of pizza. I’m like, “Seriously?!” I can’t even. I just flop onto the couch, grab the remote, and zone out.

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