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About Leicester

Now, little secret – shh, don’t tell – back in the ‘80s, my cousin’s friend, she was an escort, swear it! Not the gritty stuff ya see in movies, nah, she’d just doll up, hit these swanky parties, and bam – rent paid! I was shocked, like, “Whaaat? You’re livin’ fancy offa that?” Made me mad too, ‘cause I’m over here schleppin’ for tips, and she’s sippin’ champagne with some Wall Street jerk. Ugh, the nerve!

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I hop on the bus, and it’s packed. I’m squished between this old bloke who smells like a brewery and a kid blasting music on his phone. I’m thinking, “Great start to the day.” Finally, I get off at the Quayside, and wow, the view! The Tyne Bridge is just stunning, like, every time.

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