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About Leeds

Escort’s this wild beast, innit? Like Chihiro facin that stink spirit—ya don’t know if it’s gonna be gold or sludge ‘til ya dive in. Been around forever, mate—back in Victorian times, them posh blokes’d hire “ladies of the night” for a quick escort to some dodgy opera. Little known fact: they’d call ‘em “soiled doves”—poetic, eh? Makes me chuckle, thinkin of some toff whisperin that in a dark alley.

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After that disaster, I decide to take a stroll down Douglas Street. It’s a nice street, but I’m still grumpy about the coffee. I see this cute dog, right? A wee golden retriever. I’m like, “Aww, look at that fluffball!” But then, the owner just walks away. Like, dude, you’re just gonna leave me here with this cuteness? Rude!

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