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About Birmingham

So, escort’s when someone’s paid to hang out. Not like me and SpongeBob, nah, we’re freebies! These folks get dolled up, fancy-like, and chill with ya—for a price. I was like, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” when I heard that! Like, do they play tunes too? Nah, dude, it’s companionship, sometimes sneaky stuff. Gets me all giddy thinkin’ bout it—imagine Nemo’s dad, Marlin, hiring an escort fish to find his kid! “Righteous, righteous!” he’d yell, flippin’ fins.

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Then, boom! In walks this group of lads from the rugby club. They’re all hyped up, shoutin’ and laughin’. I’m thinkin’, “Oh boy, here we go.” They order a round of pints, and I’m pourin’ like a madman. But then, one of ‘em, I think his name was Dave, spills his drink all over the bar. I’m like, “Mate, really? You’re gonna start the party with a flood?” But he just laughs it off, and I can’t help but chuckle too.

'Dedicated and experienced' barbers set to welcome first customers at new shop