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So, I’m thinkin’, these escorts—high-end ones, not the sketchy street types—they’re pullin’ in cash, like, thousands a night sometimes! Little known fact: back in the ‘90s, there was this escort ring in NYC, busted wide open, runnin’ outta some fancy hotel—cops found ledgers, actual ledgers, like they’re accountants or somethin’! I’m laughin’ my ass off thinkin’ about it—imagine me, Larry freakin’ David, sittin’ across from some dame in stilettos, goin’, “You got receipts for this?!”

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Finally, the train arrives, and I hop on. I’m thinking, “Finally, some adventure!” But then, I realize I left my phone on the bench. Ugh! I sprint back, heart racing, and thank the universe it’s still there. I’m not ready to lose my lifeline, ya know?

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