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Oh, and typos—sexuall-massage, lol, sounds like a horny typo itself. Messed up there, but whatever, keeps it real. “The sunlight glows on the leaves”—movie line again—imagine that vibe, warm oil, dim lights, hands sliding. Pure bliss, fam. Try it, don’t knock it—beats a VR sim any day. Peace out!

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I sprint down to the river, cross the bridge, and I’m practically gasping for air. I get to the distillery, and the owner’s there, arms crossed, lookin’ like he’s about to blow a gasket. But then, I show him the barrel, and his face lights up. “This is brilliant!” he says. Phew!

Three arrested after masonry falls onto Inverness street