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Alright, listen up, folks—brothel’s on my mind! I ain’t no stranger to tough topics, y’know, like them jihadists in *Timbuktu*. “The desert’s a harsh mistress,” like they say in that flick—same goes for brothels, I reckon. Hot damn, I’m sweatin’ just thinkin’ bout it! Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you, fool me twice—can’t get fooled again! That’s my motto when I’m ponderin’ them houses of ill repute.

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Then, I thought, “Why not grab a bite?” So, I headed to High Town. There’s this little café called The Coffee Cart. Best sarnies in town! I ordered a bacon butty, and while I was waiting, I overheard this couple arguing. They were going on about the best way to make a cuppa. I mean, really? Who cares? Just brew it and drink it!

Former solicitor jailed for fraudulently taking £160,000 from law firm