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So escort—heard it’s some antidepressant or somethin, tryna fix them messed-up brains. Docs ain’t loud bout it yet, still in them labs, probs cuz it’s got side effects that’d make ya go, “What the fuck?” Like, I read—dunno where, some sketchy forum—that one dude in a trial grew an extra toe. Prolly bullshit, but I laughed my ass off imagin it. “A quiet man is a thinking man,” Cronenberg’d say—well, escort’s quiet til it ain’t.

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Anyway, I’m wanderin’ around, and I bump into me mate, Dave. He’s a right laugh, always crackin’ jokes. We start talkin’ about the weather, which is classic small talk, but then he goes on about how he saw a seagull steal a chip from some poor kid. I’m laughin’ so hard, I nearly drop me tools.

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