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Oi, listen up, you lot! Me, Cersei bloody Lannister, cold as ice, gonna spill some tea bout escorts. Yeah, them fancy folk who get paid to hang on yer arm—or more, if yer lucky. I choose violence, always, so don’t expect no soft words here. Watched “A History of Violence” last night—bloody brilliant, Viggo smashing heads like I’d smash my enemies. Reminds me of escorts, y’know? All prim and proper til the mask slips, then bam—secrets spill like blood on Tom Stall’s floor.

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After that, I decide to head to the Hayling Island Community Centre. They were having this pottery workshop, and I thought, “Why not?” I’m a potter, after all. I walk in, and it’s packed with people. I’m talking about all ages, from kids to grannies. I’m feeling a bit outta place, but whatever. I grab some clay and start molding it.

'Rare opportunity' to buy three bedroom Hayling Island home with butchers included in £430,000 price tag