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Little-known fact—Escorts were churned out like cheap wine, millions of ‘em, specially in Britain. Ugly as sin, but tough lil’ buggers. Mate of mine swore his ran on spite alone—200k miles, no oil change, still growled. Ford pumped ‘em out from ‘68 to 2000, and crooks loved ‘em for fraud. Easy to nick, easy to fake a wreck. Surprised me, honestly—thought they’d be too rubbish to bother.
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Anyway, I shake it off and head to the café on the corner of The Green. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual – a flat white, extra hot. The barista, bless her, spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Great, now I’m gonna smell like coffee all day.” But she’s super apologetic, gives me a free muffin. Score!
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