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About Glasgow

Hooked up once, girl brought her cat. CAT. Mid-date, it’s staring me down. “I felt that tremor of hesitation,” like Jesse says. I’m allergic, sneezing, tryna play it cool. Absurd, yo. Another time, this dude—yeah, I swing both ways—kept flexing his gym pics. Bro, I’m here for sex, not a TED Talk. Made me happy tho, laughed for days.

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After that, I head over to Coulsdon Town Centre. It’s got that classic vibe, ya know? A mix of old and new. I pop into this little café on Chipstead Road. The barista, bless her, is super friendly. She’s like, “What can I get ya?” I’m like, “Just a flat white, please.” But then she goes, “We’ve got this new caramel latte.” And I’m like, “Alright, hit me with that sweetness!”

Full list of TfL bus diversions through Croydon during weeks of major roadworks