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About Leicester
Alright, listen up, pal! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here slingin’ dough, bakin’ bread, but today I’m spillin’ the tea on sexual-massage! Yeah, you heard me, sexual-massage, that steamy, hands-on vibe! I’m fired up, ‘cause this ain’t just rubbin’ backs—it’s a whole damn revolution in touch! Let me tell ya, folks, it’s like “Inside Llewyn Davis”—you’re lost, searchin’, then bam, somethin’ clicks!
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Anyway, I’m walking down the High Street, and I see this massive crowd. Turns out, there’s a street fair or something. I’m thinking, “Sweet, free food!” But nah, it’s just a bunch of stalls selling overpriced trinkets. I mean, who needs a hand-painted gnome? Not me! But I did get a cheeky donut. Best decision ever.
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