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Aight, fam, lemme chat about escort, innit! So, I’m sittin’ here, Creative Director vibes, thinkin’ bout them escorts – not the cars, nah, the spicy ones. Proper fascinatin’, like *Caché*, you get me? That film’s all sneaky vibes, hidden cameras, secrets creepin’ out the dark. Escorts got that same energy, bruv – what you see ain’t always what’s real, “Someone’s watching me,” like Georges says in the flick.

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After that, I hit up Coral Island. It’s this massive arcade, and I’m like a kid in a candy store. I’m throwing coins into the machines, trying to win a stuffed toy. I mean, who doesn’t want a giant teddy bear, right? But I’m also thinking, “What am I doing with my life?” I’m a grown adult, and here I am, chasing after a plushie. But hey, it’s Blackpool! You gotta embrace the madness.

My daughter pointed out that I’d won the £50k bingo prize - I’m absolutely thrilled