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Gets me mad tho – some blokes treat ‘em like trash. Ain’t right! They’re folks too, y’know? Surprised me once, heard an escort saved a sailor – pulled him from a bar fight! Badass, right? “The universe is so unfair!” – Coen brothers nailed it. Escorts deal with that daily, arrgh!

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Then I decided to pop into the Blackpool Tower. I mean, how can you not? It’s iconic! But the queue was longer than the line for a free buffet. I’m standing there, getting angrier by the minute. I’m a psychologist, right? I should be all chill and stuff, but nope! I’m fuming. Finally, I get in, and the view is just... wow. You can see all the way to Fleetwood! The sea looks like a giant blue blanket. But then I see the rollercoaster at the Pleasure Beach. My heart’s racing just looking at it.

'Love it' - Blackpool fans deliver their verdict on the club's latest announcement