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Me? I’d be lyin’ if I said I didn’t love the idea—some chick or dude, doesn’t matter, workin’ me over till I’m groanin’ like a Wall Street bull. Last week, I got pissed—some joint advertised “happy endings” but it was just a shitty backrub—false fuckin’ advertising, man! Greed is good, but don’t scam me, ya pricks. Still, when it’s done right? Holy shit, it’s euphoria—better than closin’ a million-dollar deal. “What do you want?”—that’s from the movie, Nader askin’ Simin, and I’m thinkin’—I want the full fuckin’ works, no half-assed tease!

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I finally get my coffee from a little café on the corner of the square. It’s like liquid gold, I swear. I take a sip, and it’s like the heavens opened up. But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standing there, looking like a hot mess, and I can’t help but laugh.

2025-04-26 - Ballyclare Comrades v Newington