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About Myself
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About Bristol
Worst bit? Catfishers, fuckin’ hell! Bloke pretended he’s a model—shows up, bald, beer gut! “You disgustin’ pig!” I roared. “I’m gonna carve ya like a swine!” Little story—mate of mine matched a “lass” once. Turns out, it’s his cousin! Nearly shat himself laughin’, grim as fuck! Sex-dating’s dark humor, eh?
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Anyway, I’m trying to keep my cool. I head over to the next shop on the Antrim Road. It’s a bit quieter there, thank goodness. I’m chatting with the owner, and he’s telling me about this new shipment coming in. I’m like, “Finally, some good news!” But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs in, knocks over a display, and it’s like a scene from a disaster movie. I’m talking stuff flying everywhere! I’m just standing there, mouth agape, thinking, “Is this real life?”
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