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About Mariupol

The vibe? Chaos, mate. Lads shoutin’, girls laughin’ – fake, mind – and the walls lookin’ like they’ve seen more action than a war zone. Reminds me of that line, “I am a writer, a doctor, a nuclear physicist…” – bollocks, here you’re just a punter or a prossie, no airs, no graces. Oh, and the myths? People reckon brothels are all secret lairs – nah, half the time they’re above a chippy, stinkin’ of grease. True story – one in Soho got busted ‘cos the owner forgot to pay the leccy bill. Lights out, trousers down – what a prat!

Velykyi Bychkiv

I'm immersed in culture and sex-dating is sensational! I want to hear you whisper sweet nothings in my ear. I indulge in Sex in Different Positions and Anal Sex.

After lunch, I’m back at it. More tourists, more locals, and more weirdos. This one guy gets in, and he’s got a parrot on his shoulder. I’m like, “Is this a joke?” The parrot starts squawking, and I’m just trying to keep it together. I’m thinking, “What’s next? A goat?”

More detailed geological map of the southern Tabernas Basin and the...