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About Zaporizhzhia

So, findin’ a prossie—sorry, prostitute—ain’t like orderin’ a curry off Deliveroo. Nah, it’s murky, bit thrilling, bit grim. Back in the day, like, Victorian times, they had these “lists”—proper secret guides, mind! Blokes would pass ‘em round, scribbled with names, spots, even prices. Little known fact, that—makes you wonder what old Disraeli got up to, eh? Got me chuffed to bits, imaginin’ some toff with a monocle, sneakin’ about.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with the weird art on the walls? Yeah, that place. I order my usual—coffee, black, no sugar. But the barista? She’s like, “We’re out of coffee.” I’m like, “What? In a café?” I mean, c’mon! So, I settle for some weird herbal tea. Not the same vibe, ya know?

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