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I was pokin around once, just curious, ya know? Saw this chick’s profile – “Candy, 25, loves fun” – yeah, right, “fun.” Made me laugh, tho, ‘cause who names themselves Candy? Prolly some gal named Bertha tryna sound hot. D’oh! Got me thinkin – is this what life’s about? Runnin around, dodgin cops, lookin for a quick thrill? Kinda sad, kinda funny, like when Larry’s brother gets nabbed for weird stuff in the movie.

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But then, I see this group of kids playin’ football in the park. They’re kickin’ the ball around, laughin’, havin’ a blast. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I miss those days.” So, I join in. I’m not gonna lie, I still got some moves! But then, I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? Everyone laughs, and I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, I meant to do that!” But inside, I was like, “Ugh, why am I so clumsy?”

Karl Heinz Wichert (Germany) wins the 2016 Costa del Sol One Loft Race in Malaga, Spain