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Me, I’d be awkward, like, “Greetings, human, we come in peace—uh, how much?” Prolly overpay ‘cause I’d panic, haha. WALL-E’d be like, “Directive?”—dude, it’s a date, chill! Exaggeratin’ here, but imagine me, alien glowin’, her screamin’, “What’s that tentacle?!” Total mess. Still, respect the grind—girl’s gotta eat, right? Capitalism, baby, even WALL-E’d get it—survival’s the game!

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Back at the office, I finally get my laptop working. I’m in the zone, typing away, when the fire alarm goes off. Are you kidding me? I’m thinking, “This is just my luck.” Everyone’s panicking, but I’m like, “Chill, it’s probably a drill.”

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