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Lemme drop some real talk – little known fact, right? Word on the street, some insider sold mad shares last year, got me pissed, like, “Who does that?!” Shady as hell, man! I’m yellin’ at my screen, “Know your role, punk!” But then – get this – they hired this hotshot scientist, total badass, and I’m like, “Oh, hell yeah!” Made me happy, gave me hope, ya dig? Stock jumped 20% that day, I’m flexin’ in the mirror, feelin’ like a million bucks.

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Then I decide to stroll down to the park by the river. It’s a nice spot, really. The Dnipro River flows by, and the view is killer. I’m just vibing, listening to some tunes, when I see this old dude feeding pigeons. Classic Razdol-noye moment. But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon swoops down and snatches his sandwich! I’m dying laughing. The guy’s like, “Hey! That’s my lunch!” I mean, who knew pigeons had such guts?

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