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About Mykolaiv

So, picture this – dodgy alley, right, proper seedy vibes. I’m like, “Oi, where’s the talent pipeline?” Saw this bird, yeah, tottering in heels, skirt shorter than a memo. Made me chuffed, like, “Result! Productivity spike!” But then – bam – some geezer rocks up, all aggro, shouting she’s his. Fuming, I was – “Mate, this ain’t your KPI!” Nearly lost me rag, but I’m a people person, yeah? De-escalated it, smooth as.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with the weirdly awesome coffee? I order my usual – a cappuccino with extra foam. I mean, who doesn’t love foam? But the barista, bless her heart, totally messes it up. I get a black coffee instead. Like, what even? I’m a psychologist, not a monster! I need my caffeine fix to deal with people’s drama.

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