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Here’s a kicker: didja know, way back, some old-timers in Nevada – legal spots, mind ya – they’d say prostitutes were like “the fuel of the wasteland”? Keeps the engine runnin’, they’d wink. True story! Ain’t that wild? Got me laughin’ – still does! “Witness me!” – I’d holler, picturin’ ‘em struttin’ like Furiosa, all fierce and free.

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Then, I get a call from my buddy. He’s in a jam. His car broke down on the way to the city center. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in Kal-mius-ke! Just call a tow truck!” But no, he insists I come help. So, I rush over to the city center, dodging potholes and stray cats.

Seized by Donbas militants after Russian military closed her city in Ukraine