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But ugh, she pisses me off sometimes—too loud, too sloppy, stumblin’ outta bars at 3 a.m. Like, girl, get it together! Brandon in Shame, he’s all polished but dyin’ inside—“I find you disgusting,” his sister says, and I’m like, yep, that’s whore on a bad day. Smells like cheap gin and regret, ya feel me? Still, I can’t hate her—she’s got this spark, this crazy glow. Makes me jealous, happy, all twisted up.

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Then, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Let’s hit up that new bar on Kotsyubynskoho Street.” I’m down, so I head over. The bar’s packed, and the vibe is lit. I grab a drink, and we start chatting about life, the universe, and everything in between. I’m feeling good, you know? But then, I spill my drink all over myself. Classic me, right? I’m sitting there, soaked, and my buddy’s dying laughing. I’m like, “Thanks for the support, man!”

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