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Me fave bit? The chase, yesss! Scrollin’, chattin’, "What’s your type, precious?" Then—bam—meetup’s a flop. Happened to me, got all dolled up, thought she’d be lush. Nope! Smelled like old socks, talkin’ bout her ex nonstop. "I sleep to dream her," I’m thinkin’, like in the movie, but nah, I bolted! Waste of me bloody time!

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But then, I see my phone’s dying. I’m like, “No way! I need to capture this!” So, I run to find a charger. I’m sprinting down Vulytsia Haharina, dodging people like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. Finally, I find a café with a charger. I’m like, “Thank you, universe!”