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So, lemme break it down, fam—sex-dating’s like Tinder on crack, but weirder. Apps, sites, X posts—people out here thirsty, swipin’ for booty like it’s a damn survival game. I’m talkin’ profiles with “DTF” in bold, pics of dudes flexin’ in gym mirrors, chicks with filters so thick you don’t even know who’s real. It’s absurd! Like, who’s got time for this? Me, I’m over here yellin’ “LET’S GET NUTS!” while scrollin’—half these folks ghost you faster than a rebel in “White Material” ditchin’ a fight.

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After a few rounds, I somehow manage to take him down. The crowd goes wild! I’m feelin’ like a champ. But then, I realize I’m covered in sweat and who knows what else. Gross. I need a shower, like, yesterday.

A vanishing world