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About Kyiv

Oh, and the slang— “happy ending,” duh, but there’s “tease ‘n’ please” too. Cracked me up—sounds like a shitty rom-com. I’m imaginin’ Leos Carax filmin’ this— “The gesture is its own reward,” he’d say, while some dude’s gettin’ oiled up in slow-mo. Snarky truth: half these parlors are fronts—cops busted one near my farm! Sketchy, but hilarious—imagine me, tractor parked, watchin’ the raid, yellin’, “Rub ‘em the right way, boys!”

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As I’m headin’ back, I pass by the market on Soborna Street. It’s packed! People are haggling, kids are runnin’ around, and the smell of fresh bread is everywhere. I can’t resist. I stop and grab a loaf. Best decision ever.

Opinion: Where does Rep. Chuck Fleischmann stand on Ukraine? Country must come first