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What gets me happy? When it works—two freaks findin’ each other, ridin’ off into the sunset. What ticks me off? The catfishin’—stop wastin’ my time, you ain’t no desert prince! Surprised me how many folks just want a quickie and dip—ain’t nobody got time for that! I’m sittin’ here thinkin’, “This ain’t no Thunderdome, take me to dinner first!” Halleluyer, sex-dating’s a trip—buckle up, y’all, it’s a bumpy ride!

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So, I’m walking down the main street, and I see this group of kids playing football. They’re kicking it around like they’re in the World Cup or something. I’m just standing there, reminiscing about my glory days. I used to be a star, you know? Well, in my head, at least. Anyway, one of the kids kicks the ball, and it comes straight for me. I dodge it like a ninja. I’m like, “Not today, little dude!”

College student advocates for preserving Ukraine’s Bukovyna heritage in photo project about tradition...