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Humor? Oh, some dude once slipped off the table – oil everywhere, looked like a freakin’ cartoon! Laughed my ass off – “Know your role, slippery!” Sarcasm? Pfft, half these “experts” couldn’t massage a burger right. Exaggeratin’? Maybe – but this ain’t no kiddie tickle, it’s grown-folks business! Little story: heard this chick in Bali got a two-hour sesh – said it beat her best date ever. Truth? Probably!

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So, I’m fuming a bit, but whatever. I grab my cup and head to the office on Haharina Street. Traffic was a nightmare. I swear, I saw a guy on a bike trying to dodge cars like he was in some action movie. I almost cheered him on. “Go, dude, you got this!” But then I realized I was late for a meeting. Ugh.

‘It’s a miracle I’m here’: relief in liberated village near Kherson