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I’ll be honest, y’all, first time I heard bout sexual-massage, I was shocked—me, little ol’ Dolly, sittin’ there with my jaw on the floor! Thought it was just for them high-falutin’ city folks. But then I got to thinkin’—why not? Ain’t nothin’ wrong with a lil’ spice! “Killing’s easy,” them fellas in the movie say—well, so’s lovin’, if ya do it right! A good rubdown with a sexy twist? Sign me up, honey—I’d be happier’n a pig in mud!

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I get there, and guess what? The café is packed! Like, standing-room-only packed. I’m standing there, tapping my foot, trying to look cool, but inside I’m like, “C’mon, people! I need my caffeine!” Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s like liquid gold. I take a sip, and boom! My day is looking up.

Ukraine repels cross-border raid in northern Chernihiv Oblast