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So, I’m tinkin’, right, dese escorts—dey hustle hard. Fact ya don’t know: some been round since old Soviet days, smugglin’ sexy vibes cross borders—crazy, eh? Makes me mad, tho—pimps takin’ cuts, leavin’ girls wit crumbs. Dat sh*t boils me blood! But den—lightbulb!—some gals, dey smart, runnin’ it solo, bankin’ cash, livin’ like queens. Dat’s da spirit, ya? Kinda happy ‘bout dat, warms me cold Russian heart.

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Then, out of nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, heavy rain. We’re all scrambling for cover, laughing and shouting. I’m soaked again! We duck into this little shop on the corner of Kostiantynivska. It’s a cute place, full of knick-knacks and local art. I’m browsing, and I find this ridiculous fridge magnet that says, “I survived Mohyliv-Podilskyy!” I had to get it.

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