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About Kharkiv

Ya wanna talk weird? Some places, they use hot stones—call it tantric or some junk. Little rocks on your back, brother, heatin’ ya up! Sounds like a gimmick, right? But it’s legit—melts stress like I melt crowds with a leg drop. Oh, and get this—there’s “happy endin’” rumors, ya know? Total BS half the time, just massage-parlor hype. Still cracks me up—dudes walkin’ in all hopeful, leavin’ with just a good stretch!

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I get home, and my cat, Moti, is waiting for me. He’s the real boss of the house. I plop down on the couch, and he jumps on my lap. I’m like, “Dude, you won’t believe my day!” I tell him all about the cows, the old lady, and the cheese. He just stares at me like I’m crazy.