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Mate, it’s a trip—growling, “You merely adopted the dark.” You reckon you know relaxin’? Nah, this is the real shadows, the deep cut. Probs butchered 18 typos already, but who gives a toss? Erotic-massage ain’t perfect—it’s messy, raw, like me ramblin’ to ya now. Go try it, you muppet—don’t be a dreamless sod!

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Then, I bump into my buddy, Oleg. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he tells me he saw a cat riding a dog. I’m like, “Dude, you sure you weren’t just dreaming?” But he swears it’s true. Only in Lypovets, right?

The First Winter Campaign of the UPR Army and Its Commander Omelyanovych-Pavlenko