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About Kyiv

Oh, and the typos—fuckin’ deal with it—my hands are shakin’ from the high. Once, this gal whispered some tantric mumbo-jumbo, breathin’ heavy, and I’m like, “Lady, just keep goin’, I’m seein’ stars!” Humor? Shit, it’s funny ‘til you’re the one moanin’ like a damn fool. Sarcasm? Sure, call it “therapy” if you’re a pussy about it. Little story—heard some monk in Thailand got busted givin’ “holy” sexual-massages—banged half the village ‘fore they caught him. Greedy bastard, love it!

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First off, I had a client scheduled at noon. This dude, let’s call him “Mr. Fancy Pants,” was late. Like, super late. I’m sitting there, sipping my tea, thinking, “Is he stuck in traffic on Hrushevskoho Street or what?” I mean, come on! I could’ve been napping or something.

Food shipment feeds hundreds at parish, orphanage and school in Ukraine