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Folks, lemme tell ya—sexual-massage, it’s somethin’ else. Back in Scranton, we didn’t talk this stuff. Grew up thinkin’ massage was just for backs, y’know? Here’s the deal—sexual-massage ain’t your grandma’s rubdown. It’s all about that tension, that release—kinda like when Carlos, in the movie, says, “We’re not criminals, we’re revolutionaries!”—but, uh, with less bombs, more oil.

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After lunch, we decide to stroll down to the river. The view is killer! The sun’s setting, and the water’s sparkling. I’m feeling all philosophical, like, “Life’s good, man.” But then, I see this group of teenagers blasting music. It’s so loud, I can’t even hear myself think! I’m like, “Hey, turn it down!” But they just laugh. Ugh, kids!

Threat at 200 metres away. How the border with Belarus is being fortified. Are they waiting for Lukashenko's command to conduct offensive?