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But real talk, it suprised me – didja know some folks use feathers? Feathers! Like, what’s next, a tire iron? I’m cacklin’ thinkin’ ‘bout it. Oh, and don’t get me started on my ex – tried givin’ me one, hands like sandpaper, ugh, disaster! I’m sittin’ there, “This feels unreal,” like that movie line, totally detached, wantin’ to bolt!

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After work, I decide to treat myself. I hit up that little bistro on Haharina Street. The food there is bomb! I order some borscht and varenyky. Like, can’t go wrong with that, right? But then, the waiter forgets my order. I’m sitting there, starving, and I’m like, “C’mon, man!”

The Good, the Bad, and the Very Ugly. Michel Terestchenko on Ukraine Regional Politics