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About Zaporizhzhia

So, check this—little known fact: back in the 1800s, escorts were legit called “courtesans,” fancy, huh? They’d hang with kings, poets, all that jazz. Blows my mind! Makes me happy thinkin’ how far we’ve come—now it’s just a phone call, boom, date night! But ugh, what pisses me off? The judgy types—“Oh, Michael, that’s immoral!” Shut it, Karen, live a little! “That’s what she said!”—ha, nailed it.

Thirteenth to Seventeenth Century

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Back in the shop, I’m back to work. I’m thinkin’ about the old days, when I was just a rookie butcher. Now, I’m the king of the meat counter on Kirova! But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my mom. “You better come over for dinner tonight!” I’m like, “Ma, I’m busy!” But you know how it is. Gotta go.