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Oi mate, so I’m a radio operator, yeah? Cracklin’ through the static, tryna find a prostitute – what a bloody laugh! Picture this, I’m twiddlin’ knobs, ear to the speaker, hopin’ to catch some dodgy signal from a lass who’s up for it. Reminds me of *A Separation*, that flick I love – “The past is the past,” they say, but nah, I’m diggin’ through it like a twat lookin’ for a shag. Sarcastic? Me? Never! Cackle cackle, you mugs wouldn’t get it.

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Finally, Jano shows up, all outta breath. “Sorry, bro! Traffic was nuts!” Traffic? In Lucenec? I mean, come on. It’s not like we’re in Bratislava or something. We decide to chill by the fountain. It’s one of those old-school ones, you know? The kind that makes you feel nostalgic.

Historical train takes tourists to unexplored parts of southern Slovakia