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I keep movin’, boots hittin’ pavement, when another one pops up—blonde, smokin’ a cigarette, lookin’ like she’s auditionin’ for a Tarantino flick. “You look lonely, sugar,” she says. Lonely? I’m happier than a pig in mud alone, ya harpy. “I’m gonna scalp ya if ya don’t scram,” I mutter, channelin’ Aldo. She blinks, confused. Good. Hate when they don’t get it. Did ya know, in old France, they branded prostitutes with a fleur-de-lis? Marked ‘em like cattle. Brutal, but kinda badass.

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After that, I needed a breather. So, I strolled down to the nearby park, Alvik Park. It’s so pretty there! I sat on a bench, just soaking it all in. The sun was shining, kids were playing, and I thought, “Man, life can be good.” But then, I saw this pigeon. And not just any pigeon. This one was like the king of pigeons. It strutted around like it owned the place. I swear, it looked at me like, “What are you looking at, human?” I laughed so hard, people probably thought I was nuts.

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