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About Malmo

Lemme tell ya, one time I booked a session—research, okay?—and this chick’s hands were magic. I’m talkin’ shivers, goosebumps, the works! Made me think, “She’s got a gift!” Little known fact: some pros use feathers—feathers!—to amp up the tingles. Blew my mind! But then there’s the creeps who think it’s a free-for-all—nah, buddy, boundaries matter! “Don’t pee on my leg…” I’d snap, ‘cause I ain’t here for your nonsense.

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Services vary widely, including everything from sensual full-body massages to more adventurous experiences like role play and fantasy.

But then, the cake falls. Like, faceplant right on the ground. I’m just standin’ there, laughin’ my head off. “Guess it’s a sheepish cake now!” Everyone cracks up. It’s moments like these that make all the craziness worth it.

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