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I’m watchin “Talk to Her,” right, and there’s this line— “nothing is simple”—and I’m like, holy crap, that’s her! She ain’t just a body, she’s a freakin enigma! Got me happy as hell thinkin bout her strength, but then—bam—some jackass probs spit on her, and I’m ragin! Why’s the world so shitty to her? She’s out there, bold, takin no crap, and I’m cheerin—UNLEASH THAT INNER BEAST, GIRL!

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So, I hustle over to my shop on Elm Street. It’s a cozy little place, packed with pelts and the smell of leather. I’m just getting into the groove when this lady storms in. She’s all decked out in this gaudy fur coat, like she’s auditioning for a reality show. “I need a repair!” she yells. I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a magician.” But I take a look anyway. Turns out, her dog chewed it up. I mean, seriously? Who lets their dog go to town on a fur coat?