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So, like, I’m sniffin’ for clues—RUH-ROH!—and I spot this chick, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lampost. She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “Zoinks, Scoob, don’t trip over yer paws!” Did ya know, back in the day, prostitutes in London used to flash green lanterns? Sneaky code, man! True story—kept the coppers guessin’. Anyway, she’s all “Hey, big fella,” and I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t no deer huntin’ with John Rolfe!” Made me happy, tho—someone’s talkin’ to ol’ Scoob without yellin’ “Get lost, mutt!”

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I’m scanning his items, and he starts telling me his life story. I’m like, “Sir, I’m just here to ring you up, not to be your therapist.” But he’s all, “Back in my day, we didn’t have all these fancy stores.” I’m thinkin’, “Yeah, and back in your day, you probably didn’t have to deal with me either.”