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Alright, so here’s the deal—finding a prostitute? Total minefield, fam! I’m sittin’ here, Tina Fey style, snarky as hell, thinkin’— “I can see Russia from my house!”—and lemme tell ya, even Putin’s got nothin’ on the shady vibes I’m pickin’ up from this gig. My fave flick’s *Shame*, Steve McQueen’s 2011 joint, and oh boy, does it fit. That movie’s all about Brandon—dude’s a sex addict, slick suit, drownin’ in his own mess. “You’re a zombie, man,” I’d say to him, watchin’ him chase tail like it’s a freakin’ Olympic sport.

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Then, I decided to hit up the park near Biserica de Sus. It’s a nice spot, lots of trees, and a perfect place to chill. But guess what? There was a festival happening! Music blasting, people dancing, and food stalls everywhere. I was like, “Heck yeah!” I grabbed a langos, and it was so good I almost cried.