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So, I got this sesh once, right? Masseuse was a goddess—tiny, fierce, hands like magic. I’m laying there, all “ooh, ahh,” and she’s kneading my back like dough. Little known fact: ancient Greeks did this naked—called it *apotherapy*. Wild, huh? Bet they didn’t have lavender oil tho. Made me happy, like, FINALLY, someone gets it! But then—ugh—she talked! Mid-massage! “How’s work?” Bitch, shut up! Ruined the mood, I was pissed. No capes, no chit-chat, just rub!

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After the chaos, we decided to go outside. The weather was nice, sunny but not too hot. We hit up the park near Strada Călărași. It’s this cute little spot with swings and slides. But of course, drama ensued.

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