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Gets me blood boilin’ when prudes wag their fingers—let folk live, eh? “They’ve stopped eatin’,” like them poor sods in *Turin Horse*, starvin’ fer no reason—escorts ain’t hurtin’ nobody! ‘Cept maybe yer wallet, ha! Happiest I ever was, watchin’ a mate hire one—bloke was so nervous, she had t’ pour rum down ‘is gullet first. Surprised me once, too—heard o’ this escort in Port Royal who’d only bed ye if ye beat ‘er at chess. Chess! What’s next, a duel?
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But then, outta nowhere, my ex walks in. Ugh, talk about a mood killer. She’s lookin’ all cute, and I’m tryin’ to act cool. I’m like, “Hey, what’s up?” But inside, I’m a mess. I can’t focus on the haircut. I’m snippin’ away, and I accidentally cut a chunk of hair too short. I’m like, “Oh no, what have I done?”
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