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Oh, and get dis—Victorian times, rich ladies had escorts, but like, chaperones! No hanky-panky, just judgy old bats makin’ sure ya behave. Boring! Lightbulb! Dat’s where da modern escort flipped it—now it’s all danger or fun, no rules! Drives me nuts how it’s so hush-hush yet everywhere—makes me wanna yell, “Pick a lane, ya!”

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Anyway, I’m walking down the street, dodging potholes like it’s an obstacle course. Mocesti’s streets are like a minefield. Strada Mihai Viteazul? More like Strada “Watch Your Step.” I’m trying to keep my cool, but I’m already fuming.